Where Am I? Another Fanatic Hit By A Turtle

I am ROFLMAO as I shake off that crash I just had while following that slow moving 100-year old turtle named Donnie Walsh.  Fortunately, all that I suffered were lacerations and a slightly perforated and folded Fanatic heart, which I understand can be repaired by some nifty last minute general manager type moves – the kind of moves that would be made by a good general manager or team president like Red Auerbach, Jerry West, Pat Riley or that Presti kid in Oklahoma City. It is now a few weeks before school is back in session (remember this word for your first spelling test), so tell your children to enjoy the rest of the summer.  It goes by very quickly.  For Fanatics the summer is going by too quickly, as we watch and wait for the Turtle to catch up to it (we do feel ya Turtle Don — we can appreciate that it must be hard to move faster when one is saddled down with all those heavy futuristic 2010 plans under his hard head shell).

No one wants to acknowledge it, as the Knicks’ mouthpiece, Newsday, tries to put a positive spin on everything Walshonian (did you check out the last non-report that Walsh was relieved that Kidd rejected his offer? Now how stupid is it for a GM to make a long-term offer you don’t want accepted?), but there is a major problem with waiting this long to sign a building team’s best players: a team’s success is based on chemistry which usually starts off the court at some point in the off-season.  Yes, chemistry starts with a core of teammates who act like teammates.  Right now we have Darko, Chandler, Duhon, Hughes, Harrington and Gallinari.

If you may recall, it was clear last year that D’Antoni’s system required an early start for its players to get conditioned themselves and to their teammates.  As you also may recall, last year the Knicks at least started working out with each other in Las Vegas around the time of the summer league when everyone popped up to meet D’Antoni and watch Nate’s summer league jersey get hung on the brick wall.  Sure it was everyone’s first time in the system and they all wanted to get to know each other, but it would sure be nice if someone acted like this season isn’t just another throw away. (Or at least reduce the price of the freakin’ tickets for this season of Seven seconds or mess).

The other problem, at least in the short term, is that this whole slow grind summer has really demonstrated how little respect and confidence the Knicks have in their own players; Lee, Robinson and Duhon must not feel very good about their team right about now.  First off, Lee and Robinson don’t have teams yet.  Lee has already expressed his feeling of disrespect; Nate is just chilling, waiting for the pen or the hammer (saw?) to drop.

Duhon is straight – he’s got a contract – but he’s gotta know that flirtations with Jason Kidd, Jason Williams, Andre Miller and, now, Ramon Sessions are collectively a sign that his willingness to work overtime for the Knicks after Walsh decided not to get PG-support last season, was not really appreciated.  Walsh going kissy, kissy with so many points also belies the myth that the Knicks thought Duhon played poorly because he was tired.  If they believed that, he should be able to retain his winter job after a summer of rest – especially with rest during a summer moving this slowly.

That hit I took from the Turtle leaves me feeling a little disrespected too.  I talked to my lawyer about my personal injury lawsuit against MSG, but Ms. Sotomayor (that wise Latina) told me they have the big bucks and a good strategy to defend the accident-prone Walsh – their lawyers at Newsday claim that the Turtle was not moving slowly in the fast lane; in fact, they claim, he was being patient and doing his due diligence.  I replied, yeah right, “He was doing his due diligence by pecking at the cell phone while driving.  He couldn’t get Session’s numbers right as he took his eyes off the road.  He looked up and saw the “2009-2010 Five Weeks Ahead” sign and bumped us as we followed him onto the rumble strip and into the drainage ditch. That Old Dirty Slow Azz Turtle Bastard.”

NATE ROBINSON AND KNICKS REACH $5MIL ONE-YEAR DEAL

As most of us expected, Nate Robinson will remain a Knick for at least one more year for an approximate price of $5 million ($5.8 Million,  the league average, would make more sense but the report says $5 mil).  According to Yahoo.com,  the deal is expected to be finalized next week.  The reported agreement is more than the $2.9 million qualifying offer originally extended to Robinson.  According to the New York Times this deal will end the Knicks’ courtship with restricted free agent Ramon Sessions.

I doubt that the two are inextricably connected.  Regardless of Nate’s return, the Knicks are still looking for a point guard to replace (or phase out) Chris Duhon as the starting point guard.  Nate has shown an ability to play point for short periods but is clearly at his best as an off the bench spark plug who gives a second unit fire power and can control the tempo of the game.

Now that the Knicks have been spurned by Jason Kidd, Grant Hill and Andre Miller, they are focused on an improbable union with Ramon Sessions.   Ramon Sessions is the best bet remaining to run the offense, but it is highly likely that any offer the Knicks make to Sessions would be matched by the Bucks who just released Salim Stoudemire and Bruce Bowen, who is considering retirement, while picking up Hakim Warrick. The Bucks will need an experienced general to run its re-tooled team, which includes the addition of Amir Johnson,  until Brandon Jennings is ready to take over full time.  Luke Ridnour with his $6 million contract seems to be the odd man out eventually.

Notably, the New York Times reports that Robinson’s one year salary will not impact the 2010 plan, but that is not my understanding of the CBA.  Unless Robinson is traded at the end of the one year contract or his rights are renounced, as an unrestricted free agent Nate’s salary will count against the salary cap.  Assuming Nate’s contract is actually for the average NBA salary amount of $5.85 million, 150% of his contract  (or $8.78 million) would count against the salary cap. If his contract is below the average salary, 200% of the salary will count against the cap.

The Knicks claimed Jason Williams, 33, off waivers and have until August 6th to extend him an offer.  Reportedly the Knicks will give Williams a workout this week to determine whether they want to add the 6’1″, 190 lbs guard, known as “White Chocolate” for his stylistic ballhandling flair and confidence, to the unshaped guard corp.  Williams, who averaged 4.6 assists in the 2008-2009 season, before he retired the following year, can probably run the D’Antoni offense in short spurts and is seen as insurance should  the Bucks decide to match any offer the Knicks (or Clippers) extend to Sessions.

Except for Dolan’s penchant for serving the fans big name placebos to temporarily ease the pain of being a Knicks fan, any mention of Allen Iverson running the D’Antoni offense should be considered a joke.  The D’Antoni offense is predicated on ball movement — Allen Iverson’s game is not.  But since the season is projected to be another waste, why not bring in Iverson for entertainment value? Entertainment value is all a Iverson-Knicks union would have to offer.

Jump Balls. . . . Knicks Fix, the Newsday Knicks blog, has undergone remodeling.  The result is a user unfriendly interface which makes it difficult to follow the discussion.  Too bad.  While Alan Hahn’s love fest with his boss’ NYK President, Donnie Walsh, is bias at its most nauseating, the blog’s insights are entertaining and most often informative.  .  .  .Is Stephon Marbury a mad genius or Flava Flav’s heir apparent for the “Stephon-n-fetchit” Award. .  .

. . . Shaq has a response to Steph’s petroleum based throat lozenge